This weekend I went on a date.
I didn't know him very well, it's been kind of random the interaction we've had. We talked in the library, we've exchanged a few texts over the past couple months, I all but forgot he exists. His name is Kirk, he's from the area I'm from, but I never knew him back home. I was feeling bored this weekend, as was he, so we decided to get together and spend time together for the first time pretty much ever. I think I was more nervous for this than my date with Aaron, though I had more to be nervous about with him. I can't really explain it other than I was excited and nervous and anxious for the date to happen.
When he picked me up, we went to G's Dairy and got ice cream before heading to Smith park to toss the frisbee around and talk a bit. I've said it before, but there's nothing wrong with going to the park on a date. I've been to them a lot recently and it's been kind of nice doing something lowkey as a first date rather than something overly planned like dinner, then a movie, then hanging out at someone's apartment, then going on a walk before saying goodnight. It's great to have a whole day date, fellas, but maybe not until you really know the girl. First date? Remember to just KISS. No, not plant one on her, I mean Keep It Simple, Stupid. Don't over plan a first date.
Alas, I digress... Back to Kirk and Smith park. It was really fun. We ate our ice cream and talked about our families and our hobbies. I felt like family came up more than usual and I kept finding myself telling story after story about my parents. Weird, but kind of nice. My parents are the bomb, I love them. It was so easy to laugh and get to know Kirk better. His questions for me were interesting and things I hadn't ever really thought about. I found myself telling him things I don't normally bring up on a first date. Occasionally our hands would brush and I felt a surge of butterflies rip through my stomach. It was such a perfect day, you have no idea.
After a couple hours he took me home and asked if he could walk me to the door and insisted that he get the car door for me (I love that. I'm a sucker for a gentleman.) When we got to my front door he gave me a good, slightly lingering hug, and said, "I had a really good time with you. I'd like to see you again, maybe this next week. May I call or text you?" Of course, Kirk. You may call on me as much as you like!
Shortly after he left I got a text message from him telling me again that he enjoyed our time together. Que more butterflies.
Some of you may pause and beg the question, "What about Jake? What about Aaron?" I haven't spoken to Aaron in over a week. He's dropped off the face of the planet. He reads this blog (or does on occasion) so he should be aware that I don't know what his deal is, what he wants out of this, whether or not he just wanted to make out with someone or if he was genuinely interested in a relationship. Either way, I'm not going to go out of my way to make something work with someone who doesn't return the favor. Sorry, Aaron. You're a good guy, I'm sure you'll find an awesome girl you can't get enough of.
I decided this past week that I'm not going to even lead Jake on a little bit anymore. He's got too much baggage going on, I don't even want to attempt to deal with that. He needs more time to get over his divorce, he needs to not cling to the first (okay, second) girl that comes along. There's a girl out there for him, she's just not me.
I'm not banking on anything happening with Kirk. I'm interested, though. He's very...normal. Interesting, but normal. I like normal. It's a good thing. We'll see!
Showing posts with label Chivalry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chivalry. Show all posts
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Thursday, November 3, 2011
A Man's Man
I borrowed this from Urban Dictionary to help you get the feel for what I'm trying to get at.
Who is the Man's Man? He's the real class act. He always shaves and wears clothes that fit. He's worldly, educated, and a gentleman. He thinks that buttoned shirts are not just for special occasions and that newspapers have more than one section. While he is polite, he is not a pushover. He will swear when he needs to, but will try to control his temper. He can handle his liquor and keeps himself in shape. Most importantly, he will admit his faults and errors, because that is what real men do. For these reasons, women want him and men want to be him.
This is what I want (minus the drinking and swearing). This is what I need. I need a guy who is going to be a gentleman. I need a guy who is going to be suave, but mysterious. I need a guy who's going to crush spiders and change the oil. I need a guy who's going to watch Saving Private Ryan but get a little misty eyed while doing so. I need a guy who isn't afraid to be a man, but to balance that out with a softer side.
Too many of the guys I know are too much of one extreme, either too feminine or too manly. There's a balance that works and this is where you find the Man's Man. He's the kind of guy who'll take me on a date dirt biking followed by a lovely dinner at his apartment that we cook together. I need a guy who'll comfort me when I'm upset, but also someone who'll defend my honor at any cost. Does that make sense?
I really need a manly guy. A manly guy I can hold a long conversation about nothing, or everything, with. A manly guy who can take care of me and be humble enough to admit that sometimes he needs to be taken care of.
Who is the Man's Man? He's the real class act. He always shaves and wears clothes that fit. He's worldly, educated, and a gentleman. He thinks that buttoned shirts are not just for special occasions and that newspapers have more than one section. While he is polite, he is not a pushover. He will swear when he needs to, but will try to control his temper. He can handle his liquor and keeps himself in shape. Most importantly, he will admit his faults and errors, because that is what real men do. For these reasons, women want him and men want to be him.
This is what I want (minus the drinking and swearing). This is what I need. I need a guy who is going to be a gentleman. I need a guy who is going to be suave, but mysterious. I need a guy who's going to crush spiders and change the oil. I need a guy who's going to watch Saving Private Ryan but get a little misty eyed while doing so. I need a guy who isn't afraid to be a man, but to balance that out with a softer side.
Too many of the guys I know are too much of one extreme, either too feminine or too manly. There's a balance that works and this is where you find the Man's Man. He's the kind of guy who'll take me on a date dirt biking followed by a lovely dinner at his apartment that we cook together. I need a guy who'll comfort me when I'm upset, but also someone who'll defend my honor at any cost. Does that make sense?
I really need a manly guy. A manly guy I can hold a long conversation about nothing, or everything, with. A manly guy who can take care of me and be humble enough to admit that sometimes he needs to be taken care of.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
THAT Girl
There's a reason I don't want to be that girl. The kind of girl that pounces every boy she meets, who manages to sit next to whomever might be the hottest guy at a gathering, who practically forces her number on the male population, who struts up to a fellow after class and asks him out on a date. I don't want to be that girl and here's why:
It's been my experience that guys want to work for a girl. It's some weird testosterone thing that I don't quite understand, but I think it has something to do with conquering and feeling like a successful hunter. There's a period in a relationship where things hinge between friendship and something bigger, flirtations tossed about with a gigantic question mark floating around. The girl acts coy and reclusive, which allows for the boy to pry and pursue, with the intent of winning her over, causing her to open up and become his.
When a girl takes a more modern approach to dating, she often times finds herself either a) dating a pansy of a guy who allows her to bully the whole 'relationship' into whatever she wants, leaving her dissatisfied with the manliness of her partner. b) going on dates with guys who are reluctant, if not repulsed, by her forward attitude. Or c) someone who's just not into her, but lets her make the moves up until something like hand holding happens...and gets awkward. Basically, the 'modern', 'feminist' ways of women taking the lead don't usually end up working.
What's with girls making the moves anyway? Isn't is emasculating for a guy to have a girl ask him out or take his hand? If you're into a girl, you grow a pair and ask her out, right? I sure hope so.
That girl isn't someone I want to be. I want to have confidence, but I don't want to be overbearing and a man-chaser. I want guys to think I'm happy and pretty and awesome, but I don't want to flaunt it like today's headlines. I don't want to be the girl that asks guys on dates. I don't want to be the move maker. I want to be a risk taker, but not those kinds.
Operation ask Aaron for his number blew up in my face. I don't want to go into any more depth than that. I feel humiliated and the small glimpse of confidence (oh man, did I used to be confident...) is gone. It's like it was a sign that I'm not supposed to be that girl, even in the slightest.
One more attempt at love failed. That means I'm that much closer to success.
It's been my experience that guys want to work for a girl. It's some weird testosterone thing that I don't quite understand, but I think it has something to do with conquering and feeling like a successful hunter. There's a period in a relationship where things hinge between friendship and something bigger, flirtations tossed about with a gigantic question mark floating around. The girl acts coy and reclusive, which allows for the boy to pry and pursue, with the intent of winning her over, causing her to open up and become his.
When a girl takes a more modern approach to dating, she often times finds herself either a) dating a pansy of a guy who allows her to bully the whole 'relationship' into whatever she wants, leaving her dissatisfied with the manliness of her partner. b) going on dates with guys who are reluctant, if not repulsed, by her forward attitude. Or c) someone who's just not into her, but lets her make the moves up until something like hand holding happens...and gets awkward. Basically, the 'modern', 'feminist' ways of women taking the lead don't usually end up working.
What's with girls making the moves anyway? Isn't is emasculating for a guy to have a girl ask him out or take his hand? If you're into a girl, you grow a pair and ask her out, right? I sure hope so.
That girl isn't someone I want to be. I want to have confidence, but I don't want to be overbearing and a man-chaser. I want guys to think I'm happy and pretty and awesome, but I don't want to flaunt it like today's headlines. I don't want to be the girl that asks guys on dates. I don't want to be the move maker. I want to be a risk taker, but not those kinds.
Operation ask Aaron for his number blew up in my face. I don't want to go into any more depth than that. I feel humiliated and the small glimpse of confidence (oh man, did I used to be confident...) is gone. It's like it was a sign that I'm not supposed to be that girl, even in the slightest.
One more attempt at love failed. That means I'm that much closer to success.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Dear Guys at BYU-Idaho
Since returning to Rexburg this past weekend, I've already noticed a couple trends among the young men here.
1. Popped collars. What the heck is that? I know it's not a new trend, it's been going on since I started going to school here. I just don't get it. You look like a douche. You know what girls date douches? Bimbos. Bimbos aren't the kind of girls you want marrying you and raising your kids. Just don't do it, let the collar lay where it's supposed to lay.
2. The Euro Mullet. Do you really think that's attractive? It's only appropriate if you're from Spain or Germany and play soccer. And no, going on your mission there doesn't count. You look like you forgot to finish cutting your gross, moppy hair.
3. What's the deal with not holding open the door for a lady? Or for anyone, even. If I'm walking in the building right behind you, my arms full of a GIGANTIC guitar case, I'd appreciate a little bit of chivalry. I promise, every guy (or girl) who holds the door open for me, I will turn to you and say thanks. Because I really appreciate it.
GEEZE LOUISE, BYUI MEN!
1. Popped collars. What the heck is that? I know it's not a new trend, it's been going on since I started going to school here. I just don't get it. You look like a douche. You know what girls date douches? Bimbos. Bimbos aren't the kind of girls you want marrying you and raising your kids. Just don't do it, let the collar lay where it's supposed to lay.
2. The Euro Mullet. Do you really think that's attractive? It's only appropriate if you're from Spain or Germany and play soccer. And no, going on your mission there doesn't count. You look like you forgot to finish cutting your gross, moppy hair.
3. What's the deal with not holding open the door for a lady? Or for anyone, even. If I'm walking in the building right behind you, my arms full of a GIGANTIC guitar case, I'd appreciate a little bit of chivalry. I promise, every guy (or girl) who holds the door open for me, I will turn to you and say thanks. Because I really appreciate it.
GEEZE LOUISE, BYUI MEN!
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