Even after the disaster with that guy Dale on the dating website, I decided to still stick with if (mostly because I've already paid my three month membership.) Nothing much has come of it so far, but I've exchanged a few messages with a guy who is nerdy, albeit still cute.
His name is Blake and he's, wait for it, 32. Yikes, right? Sounds a bit old. But you know what? It doesn't really bother me. I mean, 32 is pretty much the oldest I'm willing to date, but it doesn't scare me off. Besides, he's really smart and he's pretty funny.
He asked me to have dinner with him, telling me he wants to take me to my favorite restaurant and talk more in depth about some of the things we've touched on in conversation. I'm not losing sleep because of excitement, but I'm looking forward to a night out with an interesting man.
Saturday, March 29, 2014
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Taking His Time
Finally I go on a Tinder date with a guy who isn't trying to get in my pants and then he tells me he's not active and hasn't been active since he was a young teenager. It's like the universe is against me meeting a quality man!
I woke up from an afternoon nap on Saturday to a message on Tinder from a guy I haven't spoken to in a few weeks. He asked if I wanted to go ice skating that night. I figured I didn't have anything going on and it could be fun, so I went and met him at the ice rink. We skated for a few hours and had a really good time! He was interesting and he didn't really put up any fronts. Whatever he wanted to say, he said it. He wasn't rude about anything, but he was open about things that normally wouldn't be talked about on a first date.
Ice skating is one of those dates where you expect that he'll try and hold your hands and help you around the ice, right? Maybe it was just that he plays ice hockey and I'm pretty sufficient at ice skating so I didn't need help and he respected that. He even told me that he's not a super touchy feely person and he's not the kind of guy who wants to jump right into a relationship. It was refreshing to hear that and to see it in action.
He asked to get together again, so last night he came over and watched a movie with me. Again, he didn't try anything. We sat next to each other on the couch and we weren't miles apart, but he wasn't trying to get up in my business. It would be really nice is more guys would follow suit and take their time in getting to know a girl before jumping into the physical side of a relationship!
I'm not going to pursue a relationship with this guy because we talked about religion and he's a little too set in his way of not believing, but I certainly could be friends with him.
Why can't more guys be like that? Why skip the courting part of a relationship and jump right into the physical?
I woke up from an afternoon nap on Saturday to a message on Tinder from a guy I haven't spoken to in a few weeks. He asked if I wanted to go ice skating that night. I figured I didn't have anything going on and it could be fun, so I went and met him at the ice rink. We skated for a few hours and had a really good time! He was interesting and he didn't really put up any fronts. Whatever he wanted to say, he said it. He wasn't rude about anything, but he was open about things that normally wouldn't be talked about on a first date.
Ice skating is one of those dates where you expect that he'll try and hold your hands and help you around the ice, right? Maybe it was just that he plays ice hockey and I'm pretty sufficient at ice skating so I didn't need help and he respected that. He even told me that he's not a super touchy feely person and he's not the kind of guy who wants to jump right into a relationship. It was refreshing to hear that and to see it in action.
He asked to get together again, so last night he came over and watched a movie with me. Again, he didn't try anything. We sat next to each other on the couch and we weren't miles apart, but he wasn't trying to get up in my business. It would be really nice is more guys would follow suit and take their time in getting to know a girl before jumping into the physical side of a relationship!
I'm not going to pursue a relationship with this guy because we talked about religion and he's a little too set in his way of not believing, but I certainly could be friends with him.
Why can't more guys be like that? Why skip the courting part of a relationship and jump right into the physical?
Monday, March 17, 2014
What The Hell!
Here's what I don't get: Why ask a girl on a date when you know you're going to cancel it anyway?
Dale said multiple times last week through messages that he wanted to take me out on a date. We talked about our schedules and decided that Tuesday would be the best night to get together. On Saturday he finalized plans with me and we were good to go. However, today he sent me a message saying this:
I hate to do this, but I'm going to have to cancel our date. It looks likely that I'm going to be dating someone else, and I didn't want to start something with you that couldn't go anywhere. But you're freaking awesome. Nice to talk to you.
What the hell! How on earth do you go from planning a date with me on Saturday to "likely dating someone else" on Monday? How the HELL does that happen? I mean, I haven't been out on a date with this guy, so I'm not really invested in him, but really? I think I deserve better than that. Yeah, it's nice that he told me, but it still sucks, especially because he isn't even dating anyone, he's only "likely" to be dating someone. What if it doesn't work with that girl and he comes back asking to take me on a date? I'm not going to settle for being second choice. Hell no.
Anyway, there's my rant for the day.
Dale said multiple times last week through messages that he wanted to take me out on a date. We talked about our schedules and decided that Tuesday would be the best night to get together. On Saturday he finalized plans with me and we were good to go. However, today he sent me a message saying this:
I hate to do this, but I'm going to have to cancel our date. It looks likely that I'm going to be dating someone else, and I didn't want to start something with you that couldn't go anywhere. But you're freaking awesome. Nice to talk to you.
What the hell! How on earth do you go from planning a date with me on Saturday to "likely dating someone else" on Monday? How the HELL does that happen? I mean, I haven't been out on a date with this guy, so I'm not really invested in him, but really? I think I deserve better than that. Yeah, it's nice that he told me, but it still sucks, especially because he isn't even dating anyone, he's only "likely" to be dating someone. What if it doesn't work with that girl and he comes back asking to take me on a date? I'm not going to settle for being second choice. Hell no.
Anyway, there's my rant for the day.
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Getting Out of the Winter Funk
I keep saying that I'm going to write an update, yet I can't get myself to sit down and write anything. What happened with Derek? What am I doing with my dating life? Why did I disappear when I was looking forward to finally writing about this guy I was falling for?
Well, to answer those questions shortly, Derek didn't come visit. His flight fell through last minute and he opted to stay home visiting with family. I was pretty upset. I kind of shut myself up for a couple weeks in order to figure things out. My heart and my head were both very confused. I wanted so badly to have things with Derek work out, but instead it slipped right through my fingers. I was upset, Derek was bothered that I was so upset, and we both let it escalate. Then we stopped talking. It's been weeks and we're only just getting back into talking with one another often. I'm not sure if anything will ever happen, but I'm just letting things be. It's too much for my heart to handle if I'm pressuring Derek for more than he can give.
I'm sad I didn't get to see him, but that's how life goes: not how you plan.
What's going on with me now? A lot of work, which is part of the reason I haven't written in so long. I went on a few dates with a guy who goes to BYUI who I met in the grocery store in Orem, but I can't see anything going anywhere with him.
I set up an account with an LDS dating site because I know a few people who are either dating or engaged to guys they met on there. Can't hurt to try, right? I have my first date from that site this coming Tuesday. His name is Dale and he likes a ton of the same books/movies/music that I do. He's very interesting to talk to and he told me that he was talking to a few other girls on the site, but he has found himself only coming on to check for messages from me. I'm interested to see how the date goes. It could be really fun!
I met a guy this week from my complex while I was hot tubbing. He's really cool! His name is Trevor and he promised to help me get back into the long boarding scene. We exchanged numbers and we texted quite a bit over the weekend.
There you go! Things with Derek were a downer, but all around, things aren't bad. I've just found myself in a rut where I can't seem to motivate myself to blog. I'm going to try and turn that around and blog more! Thanks for not giving up on me.
Well, to answer those questions shortly, Derek didn't come visit. His flight fell through last minute and he opted to stay home visiting with family. I was pretty upset. I kind of shut myself up for a couple weeks in order to figure things out. My heart and my head were both very confused. I wanted so badly to have things with Derek work out, but instead it slipped right through my fingers. I was upset, Derek was bothered that I was so upset, and we both let it escalate. Then we stopped talking. It's been weeks and we're only just getting back into talking with one another often. I'm not sure if anything will ever happen, but I'm just letting things be. It's too much for my heart to handle if I'm pressuring Derek for more than he can give.
I'm sad I didn't get to see him, but that's how life goes: not how you plan.
What's going on with me now? A lot of work, which is part of the reason I haven't written in so long. I went on a few dates with a guy who goes to BYUI who I met in the grocery store in Orem, but I can't see anything going anywhere with him.
I set up an account with an LDS dating site because I know a few people who are either dating or engaged to guys they met on there. Can't hurt to try, right? I have my first date from that site this coming Tuesday. His name is Dale and he likes a ton of the same books/movies/music that I do. He's very interesting to talk to and he told me that he was talking to a few other girls on the site, but he has found himself only coming on to check for messages from me. I'm interested to see how the date goes. It could be really fun!
I met a guy this week from my complex while I was hot tubbing. He's really cool! His name is Trevor and he promised to help me get back into the long boarding scene. We exchanged numbers and we texted quite a bit over the weekend.
There you go! Things with Derek were a downer, but all around, things aren't bad. I've just found myself in a rut where I can't seem to motivate myself to blog. I'm going to try and turn that around and blog more! Thanks for not giving up on me.
Saturday, February 8, 2014
Waiting
My roommates keep asking me whether or not I'm nervous for Derek to visit. You know, I don't really feel all that nervous. At this point it's mostly a mixture of being anxious and being excited.
Twelve more days until he's here and I feel like time is slowing down. This next week for me is going to be absolutely insane at work and I want to just fast forward through it to the following week. I don't even know what Derek and I are going to do other than we're going to spend a ton of time together. And you know what? I have no qualms about that. I would love to just spend a weekend with Derek talking and watching movies and making dinner together. We don't need to have a lot of plans, since we're doing this so we can spend time with each other.
It's either going to make or break us and I'm ready to find out. He and I have a lot of potential, but we need to see each other to know. Twelve days until we find out. Until then, I wait. Forgive me if I don't have much to write about for the next little while.
Monday, February 3, 2014
Happiness
Kirk texted me this past week asking to see me on Saturday. My immediate reaction was to tell him "No thanks," which isn't something I've ever felt like telling him before. There's always been a part of my heart that has been dying to have him come to me like that. Of course, every time he has in the past I've been let down and crushed because that's what he does best. But this time? I didn't have any sort of inclination to see him, only to tell him no as quick as possible.
Is this what being happy is like? Is being happy forgetting my past heart aches? I can't even describe how good it feels to not want to have anything to do with Kirk. I feel like I'm on top of my game right now. I have a job that I freaking love and I can't help but continue to fall for Derek.
It's little things, like how Derek will text me first most days and how he congratulates me on doing a great job at work after a busy day. Or how he has all sorts of cheesy puns and he's constantly making me laugh. From hundreds of miles away Derek treats me better than any guy has treated me in a long time. He's romantic, but gets embarrassed. He's frank about what he likes and what he doesn't like because he's older and has had his own share of heart breaks.
This is what happiness feels like. If this is a dream, then I never want to wake up.
Is this what being happy is like? Is being happy forgetting my past heart aches? I can't even describe how good it feels to not want to have anything to do with Kirk. I feel like I'm on top of my game right now. I have a job that I freaking love and I can't help but continue to fall for Derek.
It's little things, like how Derek will text me first most days and how he congratulates me on doing a great job at work after a busy day. Or how he has all sorts of cheesy puns and he's constantly making me laugh. From hundreds of miles away Derek treats me better than any guy has treated me in a long time. He's romantic, but gets embarrassed. He's frank about what he likes and what he doesn't like because he's older and has had his own share of heart breaks.
This is what happiness feels like. If this is a dream, then I never want to wake up.
Monday, January 27, 2014
Terrified
It's hard to say that things with Derek are progressing because we're so far apart, but I definitely can't say that they're staying the same. This week we tried out FaceTime for the first time and I have no complaints other than it was over too soon.
When my phone started ringing there was a split second when I thought, "What if Derek has a voice that I can't stand?? That's going to be a deal breaker for me. Ahhh!!!" Then I answered the phone and was pleasantly greeted by a scruffy Derek with a perfect voice. I was so relieved. He and I talked for about half an hour and he introduced me to his sister and brother in law. It was a little awkward talking through that medium, but it was nice to see him while we talked.
I'm trying not to get ahead of myself, since so much can go wrong with this, but I really enjoy everything about Derek. The conversation flows so incredibly well. I was talking with one of my roommates about him and I told her how I don't want to say anything about love yet since it's so soon and he and I haven't met face to face and she said, "I don't think you need to say anything about it; it's all over your face and how you talk about him."
I'm freaking terrified.
When my phone started ringing there was a split second when I thought, "What if Derek has a voice that I can't stand?? That's going to be a deal breaker for me. Ahhh!!!" Then I answered the phone and was pleasantly greeted by a scruffy Derek with a perfect voice. I was so relieved. He and I talked for about half an hour and he introduced me to his sister and brother in law. It was a little awkward talking through that medium, but it was nice to see him while we talked.
I'm trying not to get ahead of myself, since so much can go wrong with this, but I really enjoy everything about Derek. The conversation flows so incredibly well. I was talking with one of my roommates about him and I told her how I don't want to say anything about love yet since it's so soon and he and I haven't met face to face and she said, "I don't think you need to say anything about it; it's all over your face and how you talk about him."
I'm freaking terrified.
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