Beating the BYU Ratio

When I started school at BYU-Idaho the boy to girl ratio was about 1:3. Over the years it's evened out a little bit, so it's probably closer to 1:2 now, but even when I left it felt like the amount of eligible guys to girls was still around 1:3, if not worse. As a pretty average girl, it was hard to beat the odds. I wasn't very aggressive in dating, so I didn't end up going on a lot of dates like the more aggressive girls did.

I don't know much about the ratio at BYU, but I've been told it's close to 1:2 guys to girls. So I guess it's probably the same situation as BYU-Idaho...? amiright?

So how does one beat these odds? It's a different game for guys and girls, as it usually is. Guys have to learn how to man up and ask a girl out. Girls have to learn how to rise above the sea of other women. It's a challenge.

MEN

You've got to be ballsy. You've got to narrow in on one girl who piques your interest and then pursue her. Girls are going to lose interest in you if they see that you can't make up your mind and you want to chase every cute girl who crosses your path. That kind of behavior will cause you to be labeled a PLAYER. Is that the reputation you want? Hopefully not.

Okay, so you've picked your one girl.  Now what? How do you manage to keep her interest? Play it cool. Don't be over eager, but don't leave the girl hanging, either. Ask her out. Do something simple for the first date, and make sure it doesn't last a million hours. You might want to go get ice cream, then go on a walk, then watch a movie, then stay snuggled on the couch with her for hours. Trust me! Hold off. Don't do it all on the first date. It's too fast. You'll burn through the whole chase and catch phases of a relationship in one night and, chances are, your relationship will peak and burn quickly.

It's hard to prolong the chase phase of a relationship when you are really into a girl and she seems pretty into you, too. DO NOT DO IT. Trust me on this one, guys. Draw out the chase. Let the anticipation build. You'll thank me.

It's really that simple, men. Nut up, pick one, go for it, don't rush it.

WOMEN

There are a few different groups of women at the BYU schools. There is a fairly small group of modelesque, gorgeous girls. These are the girls that all the guys are chasing. When people joke that 1% of the ward gets 99% of the dates, it's these girls who are the 1%.  Then you have the small-ish group of weird/awkward/sweet spirits. There tend to be quite a few of these girls and they are (typically) one extreme or the other. They are either SUPER vocal and obnoxious, or they are super quiet and mousy. These are the two types of girls that get noticed the most, whether or not it's good noticing or not so good noticing.

What about the rest of us? The normal girls who aren't gorgeous, but who aren't plain Janes? We tend to fall through the cracks and fade into the background, yet we're the largest group of girls. What the heck?? Girls, don't let yourself be just an average girl. I've tried so hard to fight against just being an average girl. I'm not drop dead gorgeous, but I'm pretty. I know that I've got something to offer, I just have to go the extra mile to be noticed.

How do you get noticed? Own who you are. If you're uncomfortable in your own skin, guys will notice and be repelled. No one wants to date someone who doesn't know how to be content with life on their own. So start by doing things to boost your confidence in yourself. Hit the gym, buy an outfit that makes you feel gorgeous just by looking at it, and smile! When you feel good about yourself, you'll immediately start radiating a gravitating confidence. Men like confident women.

Once you've built up your self image, try your hand at some obvious flirting. Like the guys, you have to narrow your sights. Flirt lightly with all the cute guys you encounter, but lay it on really thick with the one guy you really want to snag. Make sure he knows who you are. Strike up conversation with him, touch his arm when he talks, and laugh when he says funny things. Mention that it would be fun to do certain things with him. Make him know that you want to spend time with him.

It's a lot of work to be successful in the BYU/BYU-Idaho dating world. The ratio is weird and some of the people are weird. The key is this: you can't just sit on your butt waiting for someone spectacular to fall into your life and whisk you away to the temple. You've got to work, whether you're a guy or a girl.