Flirting: To Play At Love

Flirting.  We all do it, it's enjoyable, it's playful, it's fun.  But what is it?  Why do we do it?  What does it mean?

My personal definition of flirting is it's a slightly sensual, inviting, teasing way of interacting.  The dictionary says flirting is "to play at love."  It's lighthearted, sometimes serious, sometimes innocent fun.  Flirting is one of the main ways men and women can interact and introduce the possibility of something bigger blossoming.  It's hard not to flirt with someone you're into.  It's a way to show that person that you are fun, interesting, and clever.  I like to think of myself as a master flirt, since I've had ample time and boys to practice.  It's an art form, really.   It's all about the subtle moves and the subtext underlying the words you use.  Once you've master the two individually, the combination of a movement and a simple comment that could mean so much can do a lot to a guy (Or a girl, whichever.)

There's this guy, Chase, with whom I'm good friends.  He served in the same mission as Aiden.  While Chase was on his mission, his family moved into my stake, so now he's in the same YSA ward as me and Aiden.  We hang out on the weekends with big groups (Chase works a summer job about 2 hours south of here, but comes home on the weekends) and it's awesome.  He's not the kind of guy you'd see and think, "Oh dang!  That is one great looking dude!  I want him NOW!"  Don't get me wrong, he's attractive, but he's not drop dead gorgeous.  He's tall (like, really tall), dark hair, pretty hazel eyes, but he's a little awkward looking.  I think that's why I'm attracted to him; I like the awkward boys.  Chase is hilarious.  I enjoy a good banter and Chase is a good banterer, I could talk to him endlessly.  I think it's his wit that makes him that way.  Whatever it is, there's something simply irresistible about this guy.

Last weekend Chase came over to my house and we sat in my room on my bed (with the door propped open, my parents were home) and talked.  He told me all his woman woes, which are many.  He's got chicks throwing themselves at him right and left and he doesn't know how to field them away.  He likes this girl who lives in his hometown, a couple states away. She's just barely 18 and his best friend's younger sister, so he's feeling a little hesitant, but he really digs her.  I'm the cool platonic girlfriend, so he can tell me all these things and feel like we're on safe ground, stuck in the friend zone.  In fact, Chase wants me to act as his secretary of dating so I can help him get rid of all the unworthy girls and send all the hot ones on to him.  I'm flatter that he would trust me that way, but his shallowness is ridiculous.  He's got a type: tall, skinny, leggy, cheerleader girls.  I'm not tall, not a cheerleader type, I've got killer legs, but they're shot,and I'm not the skinniest (I'm not overweight, but I'm not rail thin.)  So the friend zone.  I'm stuck there, probably for awhile.

Where's the correlation between flirting and Chase?  We flirt a lot.  It goes right along with the banter that goes on.  We joke around that we're almost dating and he calls me Babe all the time.  It's supposed to be a strategy to get girls who he doesn't want to like him to think he's unavailable, but I think I'm enjoying it way too much.  With the whole Tyson thing fresh in my mind, having something fun to throw my attention into is such a relief.  I like being able to take my mind off of something so negative that makes me feel like crap and focus on something that's fun and lighthearted and doesn't really call for much effort or commitment.

In short, I like flirting with Chase.  I like pretending to be his almost girlfriend, but not having to be committed.  I like not having to think about Tyson all the time.  We'll have to wait and see what happens, though.  Chase and I will both be going on to BYUI in the Fall, so we'll see if I can progress out of the friend zone.